Illness

It came upon me gradually
a little scratch in the throat
some sneezing
lethargy.
I fought it,
refused to allow it to have its way with me.
Perhaps I should have given in
and gone to bed on time
instead of staying up late every night
and getting chilled
because the weather changed.
I didn't do that.
Now I have a full blown cold.
Not debilitating
I can walk around
The fever is low grade.
The starch is all gone however.

Now comes the dilemma.
With things piling up around me
and places that I need to be,
can I allow myself the luxury of rest?

I had a day off yesterday
but it was busy, very busy,
and I was so tired.
I have even less energy today.

What does it mean to care for oneself
when the world clamors at your door?
The to do list is endless.
The house is in squalor.

Only I can make that call.
The temptation is always great
to be super woman
taking charge
caring for the world
doing it all
meeting everyone's expectations
with a smile.

But I am tired, really tired.
It's too hard to be on the treadmill today.
Today will be a day of Sabbath rest
as I reflect on the meaning of Thanksgiving
and what I will share with my people
on Sunday.

I am grateful for the pause.
O God, come to me.
Pour your healing presence
into my parched soul
that I might become a vessel
that will glorify you.